Quiet City – DivX Version (Normal Quality), iPod/iPhone Version
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IMDB rating: 6.80 Plot: Jamie is 21. She’s from Atlanta. She’s come to Brooklyn to visit her friend Samantha, but she can’t find her. Jamie tries calling, but Samantha’s phone is dead. Jamie meets Charlie when she asks him for directions. Nothing to do and nothing but time leads them to bowls of coleslaw, footraces in the park, art shows, and after parties. |
Available versions:
DivX Version (Normal Quality), iPod/iPhone Version
Actors: Lankenau Cris,Swanberg Joe,Stone Tucker,DeWitt Keegan,Nuhn Daryl,Tully Michael,Wells C. Mason,Drama,
Ever heard these really funny church jokes ?
Heaven
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?"
The man says, "Methodist."
St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be
very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. "Religion?"
"Baptist."
"Go to room 18, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
A third man arrives at the gates. "Religion?"
"Jewish." "Go to room 11, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
The man says, "I can understand there being different rooms for
different religions, but why must I be quiet when I pass room 8?"
St. Peter tells him,
"Well the Catholics are in room 8, and they think they’re the only ones here.
=====
Three Friends Go to Heaven
After dying in a car crash, three friends go to
Heaven for orientation. They are all asked the same
question: "When you are in your casket, and friends
and family are mourning over you, what would you like
to hear them say about you?"
The first guy immediately responds, "I would like to
hear them say that I was one of the great doctors of
my time, and a great family man."
The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was
a wonderful husband and school teacher who made a
huge difference in the children of tomorrow."
The last guy thinks a minute and replies, "I guess
I’d like to hear them say, ‘Look, he’s moving!"
===
Parking
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short
of time and couldn’t find a space with a meter.
So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times.
If I don’t park here, I’ll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note.
"I’ve circled this block for 10 years. If I don’t give you a ticket, I’ll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."
====
Walking Out
"I hope you didn’t take it personally, Reverend," an embarrassed woman said after a church service,
"when my husband walked out during your sermon."
"I did find it rather disconcerting," the preacher replied.
"It’s not a reflection on you, sir," insisted the church goer.
"Ralph has been walking in his sleep ever since he was a child."
Love them! catholics…lol…
Vera V. | Nov 13, 2009
I loved them all, especially the first one:D
TILTONk | Nov 13, 2009
haven’t heard. really funny
Destiny | Nov 13, 2009
nice and funny, thanks.
Terry,JackofHearts | Nov 13, 2009
i have 2!
Jacob went to the preacher and said "Preacher everytime you preach my wife falls asleep what can i do to keep her awake." The preacher hands him a sharp pin and says "everytime she falls asleep poke her with this. So next sunday comes around and teh preacher starts preaching. Jacob’s wife starts to fall asleep. The preacher says "Who is the creater of heaven and earth!?" Jacob pokes his wife and she shoots up and says "God!" the preacher says "Very good Sarah" she sits back down and falls asleep again. The preacher says "And who died for all our sins and hung his head for us?" Jacob pokes his wife and she shoots up and says "Jesus!" the preacher says "great Sarah!" she sits back down and falls asleep again. the preacher says "And what did Eve say to Adam when she woke up the first morning?" Jacob pokes his wife and shoots up and says "Poke me with that damn thing again and i’ll kill you!"
3 ladies go to heaven and are greeted at Saint Peter’s Gate. The first lady walks up and Saint Peter says "You may go in but if you step on a duck you will be chained to the ugliest mate for eternity." She walks in and sees ducks everywhere, about 4 steps in she steps on a duck. Instantly she’s chained to a ugly man for eternity. The second lady walks up and Saint Peter says "you may go in but if you step on a duck you will be chained to the ugliest mate for eternity." she goes in and halfway to her destination she steps on a duck. Instantly she’s chained to the ugliest mate for eternity. Finally the third lady walks up and Saint Peter says "you may go in but if you step on a duck you will be cahined to the ugliest mate for eternity." she goes in. She is the only one who makes it to her destination without stepping on a duck, anxious to see her prize she is instantly chained to a real handsome man. She says "Wow! How did end up with you!" He’s confused and says "I don’t know I just stepped on duck and boom i was chained to you!"
lol i hope u like em! <3
Kelli | Nov 14, 2009
That’s fukd up. I’m Catholic. But here’s a funny for you.
Two Irish laborers are digging a ditch across from a brothel. After a while they see a Jewish rabbi duck into the brothel. Says one to the other, "What’s with the world now that men of the cloth are going to such places." They continue to work. Soon a Protestant minister is seen running into the whorehouse. " ‘Sno wonder the youth are all confused what with the example the clergy is settin’ for them." At the end of the day they see a Catholic priest go into the brothel. "Oh no," says the other, "one of the poor lasses must be dyin’."
dex_the_dragon_slayer | Nov 14, 2009
I really like the one about the ticket. Sooooo funny!
Thanks.
Tara | Nov 14, 2009
I like the second one best and yes, the first one was funny too but I hope you don’t believe that Catholics think they are going to be the only ones going to Heaven!
It would be the funniest joke ever because we don’t believe that we are!
Jesus said ‘There are many mansions in my Father’s Kingdom’ and ‘No-one comes to the Father except through me’ Many religions follow Jesus as their Saviour and Lord not only Catholics!
I know it was only a joke but I hope it was not a case of many a true word spoken in jest on your part!
Actually it is a joke that Catholics tell too!
your sister in Christ
Jesus is Lord | Nov 14, 2009
Hi cammi
You will never see me in church , i would not stop laughing soon as any one spoke he he he
A Knight In Shining Armour | Nov 14, 2009